


All's War in Fair and Love

by Dandybear



Series: LaundryVerse [4]
Category: Avatar (TV), Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Baatar is also there but forever alone, F/F, F/M, LaundryVerse, M/M, Modern AU, Welcome to the Korvira Trashpile
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-10
Updated: 2014-12-10
Packaged: 2018-02-28 22:08:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2748929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dandybear/pseuds/Dandybear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rotating POV.</p><p>The gang goes to the fair. Asami is a grumpy butt. Wuko are fuckboys. Korra and Kuvira get into a war over who can win the other the bigger plushie at the midway. Varrick faces the existential void. It's fun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All's War in Fair and Love

Baatar is sure this classifies as some sort of torture. His knees are spread around the back of the seat in front of him because its occupant cranked the whole thing. To make matters worse, he’s being subjected to his sister’s horrible taste in music. The speakers throb with dance beats and the amount of autotune in this song should be illegal.

 

He leans between the driver and passenger’s seat, balancing himself against the console.

 

“I’m driving on the way back.” He says.

 

Baatar leans back just in time to get hit by Korra’s flailing elbow. She’s escalated to chair dancing and they’re both singing (if he can classify that cacophony as such) along.

 

The chair bounces dangerously close to his groin.

 

“Korra, if you sack me then we’re switching seats.”

 

“Not happening, dude, we’re here!”

 

The car is in a long line of cars waiting to turn into the biggest parking lot he’s ever seen. Nothing but cold concrete for almost a mile. Baatar leans against the pane of his window to see the Amusement Park.

 

The park is half on land, half on boardwalk. It’s main attraction is fast roller coaster called ‘The Varrinator’, which has given people heart attacks.

 

Kuvira pulls into a park space near the entrance (as close as they can get) and swivels in her seat to look at Baatar. He’s trapped in the back seat until Korra leaves.

 

“We need to get Mom and Dad to make an amusement park in Zaofu.” Kuvira says.

 

She sounds very passionate on the matter. He didn’t know this was a thing she was into.

 

(Like the rope marks on her wrists that he desperately doesn’t want to know about.)

 

Speaking of being bound or otherwise imprisoned, Korra finally gets out of the fucking car, freeing him.

 

Korra’s standing outside typing like it’s exercise. She does that annoying thing where she says every word she types like she’s someone’s grandparent.

 

“We… just… got… here. Where are… you… guys?” She says.

 

Baatar huffs and pulls out his E-Cig. Kuvira checks her phone before coiling an arm through the crook of Korra’s arm, effectively linking them.

 

They look like a matched set. Both wearing hip hop pants, boots, and jackets. Kuvira’s in forest green with her studded leather jacket and Korra’s in blue striped sweats and a parka. He’s glad to be the odd one out in his skinny jeans, trenchcoat, and oxfords.

 

They follow Korra’s lead weaving through cars toward the park entrance. There’s a line to get in and loud drumming coming from the park. Korra makes a beeline for a group of people near the entrance nursing warm drinks. The group has about five or six. Mostly men. Baatar blinks and adjusts his glasses. He recognizes that silhouette. Short and curvaceous, a green toque covering a textured bob.

 

Kuvira tenses like a predator and gets that wicked look. She untangles herself from Korra and takes off at a terrifying pace. It’s like watching a panther take down a baby rabbit. Opal shrieks and flails as she is lifted off the ground and thrown over Kuvira’s shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

 

Baatar jogs over to them to provide intervention if needed.

 

“Put me down you jerk!” Opal says.

 

Kuvira has shifted her so that Opal’s draped around her older sister’s shoulders like a human scarf. She’s spinning them around. Opal’s cries turn into reluctant laughter. Her toque flies off and lands on the pavement. Baatar bends to pick it up. Kuvira slows and stumbles, a little breathless, and lets Opal down. They lean against each other.

 

“You suck and I am way too old for that.” Opal says half into Kuvira’s jacket.

 

The rest of the group is giving them a mixture of concerned and confused looks.

 

Opal taps Kuvira’s chest with her index finger.

 

“Guys, this is my older sister,” Baatar places Opal’s hat back on her hair, “and my older brother. Though, I have no idea why they are here.”

 

Korra’s caught up by now and wiggles a gloved hand.

 

“That’s because I brought them. Kuks, you never told me Opal was your sister.”

 

Opal takes a step back and scrunches up her face to scrutinize them. Kuvira grabs Korra’s still wriggling fingers and threads them together. Baatar rolls his eyes and puffs his E-Cig.

 

“Wait, Kuvira, you’re Korra’s new girlfriend.”

 

The stoutest guy of the group, who Baatar recognizes from Facebook as Opal’s boyfriend, Bolin rubs at his head.

 

“So, let me get this straight, just by coincidence Korra ended up dating your older sister?”

 

The tallest guy of the group(who looks uncomfortably like a poutier version of Kuvira) rubs his sinuses.

 

“Yes, Bolin, that’s what Opal just said.”

 

“I’m Baatar, by the way.” Baatar says.

 

They all look back and forth, remembering that Opal hasn’t actually introduced anyone yet. Opal slaps her own face.

 

“Right, my oldest brother, Baatar Beifong Jr, and my only sister, Kuvira Bei-”

 

“Kuvira Singh.” Kuvira says sharply.

 

She holds the hand not attached to Korra out to shake. Baatar follows suit. He learns everyone’s names. There’s Asami(Asami fucking Sato, design and engineering genius!), Korra’s stylish roommate, Bolin the Idiot, Mako is Bolin’s tall older brother and very closeted, Wu is Mako’s twink “charge” apparently in need of a body guard, and Varrick who owns the theme park and refuses to look away from his phone.

 

Baatar falls into step beside Asami as they head to the fast track lane. She looks even more beautiful and intelligent in person.

 

“Can I just say that your alterations to the Model F is engineering turned into art?” He says.

 

Asami’s eyes widen. She clearly didn’t expect him to open with that. She pushes her hair behind her ear and looks to the side.

 

“Thanks, took a lot of sleepless nights and tearing engines apart to get it that way. The result was worth it though.”

 

The ticketeer waves them through without charging them. No one seems bothered by this but Kuvira.

 

“Why aren’t we paying?”

 

“I own the theme park.” Varrick says.

 

“Isn’t that an irresponsible use of power?” She says.

 

Baatar closes his eyes because now is really not the time for an impassioned speech about the rights of the worker and equal opportunity benefits at a theme park.

 

“Hey, pay if you want, but it’s why I became rich. Well, that and leaving big tips and building a slide from my office to a ball pit.” Varrick says.

 

Kuvira looks almost incensed at the waste. Korra kisses the frown off her face. It makes Mako and Asami frown and exchange a look.

 

Ha, Mako is Korra’s ex.

 

Baatar is so going to tease them about Korra having a type.

 

“So, what first?” Opal says.

 

Bolin hops from foot to foot waving his arms like a freaking child.

 

“Ooh! Oh! I wanna go on the Varrinator.” He says.

 

“Didn’t someone die on that?” Wu says.

 

“Allegedly.” Varrick says, finally looking up from his phone.

 

He drops his arms to his sides and hunches his shoulders, a shadow passing over his face.

 

“Besides, if you want scary then get on the Zhu Li. It will lift you up and then drop you suddenly, leaving you feeling empty and full of existential doubt.” He says.

 

Bolin smiles in the taught way of someone who’s heard this before. He gives Varrick a clap on the shoulder.

 

“Who is up to ride the Varrinator with me?”

 

The adrenaline junkies seem excited at riding the death trap. Opal looks like she’s searching for an excuse.

 

“I’d like to get a chance to catch up with my little sister.” Baatar says, throwing her a line.

 

Opal flashes him a grateful smile and they link arms.

 

“Come onnnn Mako, it’ll be fun.” Wu says.

 

He’s tugging on Mako’s sleeve and pouting in a way that makes his already prissy personality less attractive. Mako folds his arms in defeat.

 

“I’m in.” He says.

 

“It’s my policy as an engineer to not go on rides I haven’t designed.” Asami says.

 

They all stare at Varrick, who appears to still be in a dark place. Asami takes his silence as a ‘No’ and grabs the edge of his jacket.

 

“Come on, Varrick. Why don’t you come with us and throw money at your existential void?”

 

That snaps him out of it. He takes off like the Drum Major of a marching band.

 

“Come on kids, let me show you the best fair food the city has to offer.” He says.

 

“Isn’t this the only fair in the city?” Baatar says.

 

Varrick turns to give him a manic grin that comes off more like a snarl. Baatar raises his hands in a ‘don’t shoot’ motion, apologetic. Opal elbows him gently to the ribs.

 

“Come on, lets gorge ourselves and street meat.” She says.

 

“Aren’t you supposed to be a vegetarian now?” He says.

 

“Not when I’m away from the temple.”

 

Baatar scoffs and shakes his head. Trust Opal to join a religious commune and then blatantly ignore their rules. Typical Beifong behavior to raise one’s middle finger at authority. Or, you know, become the authority.

 

Opal is telling him some story, but Baatar finds himself watching the almost casual way Varrick’s hand brushes Asami’s waist while he orders food. He squints at them. It seems like two well-known Republic City celebrities knocking boots would be something the paparazzi would be on top of.

 

“How long have those two been dating?” He interrupts Opal.

 

She follows his gaze and sees Asami lean against Varrick as she grabs her drink. Her lips purse (something their mother does when she’s thinking as well).

“They’re not.” Opal says.

 

Baatar rubs his hands. He loves a good scandal.

  
  


 

* * *

 

 

Mako isn’t sure about this new girlfriend of Korra’s. He also isn’t sure about the integrity of the ride he’s on, but that’s not really the matter at hand.

 

Wu is clutching his arm and screaming.

 

Kuvira came into Korra’s life so suddenly. Asami says she’s into politics, what if she’s just trying to get a chance to marry into chiefdom of the South Pole? No, that doesn’t make any sense. Tonraq’s the elected chief, not the hereditary chief. There is no line of succession.

 

The coaster drops suddenly and Mako grips the bar harder. He can hear Bolin whooping from the front of the kart.

 

Furthermore, it seems like a pretty big coincidence that another member of the Beifong family would join their group through romance. Mako makes a note to ask Chief Beifong about her older niece.

 

“Mako, I think I’m gonna be sick!” Wu says.

 

Mako prays the ride will be over before he has to clean vomit off his freshly pressed shirt.

 

Thankfully, it does. The same mercy cannot be said for his shoes. He’s holding out a hand to help Wu out of the kart and boom, vomit all over new leather.

 

“Oh man, bail!” Bolin says.

 

Mako sighs through his nose.

 

“I’m sorry Mako.” Wu says.

 

It’s the tears in his eyes and the fact that he looks like a carsick puppy that keeps Mako from getting angry.

 

“No more rides for you.” Mako says.

 

“Mmkay.”

 

Wu tucks himself against Mako’s arm. Mako flinches, not enjoying the public display of affection. Especially not around his ex-girlfriend, that’s just tacky and inconsiderate.

 

Speaking of Korra where did she--

 

Oh. She’s making out with her new girlfriend against the fence by the exit gate. Mako grunts and links arms with Wu.

 

“Let’s go find the others shall we?” He says loudly.

 

Korra pulls away from a kiss and holds up her phone.

 

“They’re over by the aquatic attractions. Something about throwing balls at Tiger seals.”

 

Kuvira looks like she wants to continue kissing Korra, but knows the moment has passed. Instead they link their fingers together. They collectively wait for Bolin to come back from the bathroom before they go in search of the rest of their party.

 

It’s Kuvira and Korra at the head of the party with Bolin in the middle, and Mako and Wu taking up the rear.

 

“I thought you were over Korra.” Wu says.

 

He’s examining his nail beds to feign nonchalance, but Mako can read the anxiety coming off of him in waves.

 

“I was! I am! I dunno. I don’t think anyone can ever truly be over Korra.” Mako says.

 

Bolin (eavesdropper) chimes in, “I can confirm that a healthy relationship of three years will still not result in being over Korra. She’s impossible to get over.”

 

“Thanks, Babe, that makes me feel so much better.” Wu says.

 

Bolin furrows his brow and looks between the two of them. He raises his index finger and moves it between their faces, then he lowers it to their groins. Mako makes an uncomfortable noise.

 

“Wait, you two are dating?”

 

“No.”

 

“Yes.”

 

They say it at the same time. Mako glares at Wu who glares back. Bolin claps his hands, getting the attention of the group leaders.

 

“Ha! I knew it. Asami owes me 200 yuans!”

 

Mako grabs Bolin by the bicep hard. He drags him close and talks through gritted teeth.

 

“Bolin, you can’t tell anyone.”

 

“Hey, is everything okay?” Korra says.

 

She’s walking closer and Mako’s almost out of time.

 

“Why not, Bro?”

 

“Yeah, why not Mako?”

 

He knows he’s going to be in the doghouse for this.

 

“Because it’s unprofessional for me to be dating my charge!” He says.

 

They both seem deflate at the unexpected twist.

 

“It could cost me my job.”

 

Wu clings a little tighter to him.

 

“Why are you all standing around creating some kind of tableau?” Kuvira says.

 

She and Korra are staring at the three of them with their hands on their hips. A brightly coloured flag behind their heads celebrates ten years since the theme park’s opening.

 

“We should really catch up with the others.” Mako dusts himself off.

 

“We’re here.”

 

He turns to his left and sees the blue building marked ‘Brand New! Aquarium’. It’s on the very edge of the boardwalk and half of the building either floats or is underwater. A genius looking design, but probably hard to maintain. The weather’s too cold for swimming right now and Mako bets the inside of the aquarium is freezing.

 

He’s correct of course, he can see his breath as they enter (flashing the badges Varrick gave them.)

 

The inside of the aquarium is a wonder to behold. Now he knows a real architectural genius must have had a hand in this.

 

“This must be the super secret project my mom was helping Varrick with.” Korra says.

 

Her features are open with awe. Mako takes a moment to gaze on her pure joy before turning back to the building. The walls are lined with mosaics made of beach glass. Pillars of glass made to look like ice sculptures.

 

A winding stairway leads them down into the ocean. Dark shadows and glittering fish flit past the glass. Mako watches Kuvira’s grip on Korra tense as they go deeper and further. The passage opens up to a chamber lit by eerie blue-green light. Some of the shadows moving past the glass look uncomfortably big now. The room encourages sitting and watching. White plush benches line the centre of the room.

 

“Damn near cost me the same as the rest of the park. Was completely worth it of course.”

 

Mako flinches. Varrick managed to sneak up on all of them. He looks around and sees Asami, Opal, and Baazar (or whatever his name is) entering through another passage.

 

“Varrick! How did you?” Bolin says.

 

“Manage to verbally answer your mental question at the exact moment you asked it? Simple! I have cameras everywhere.”

 

He wraps an arm around Bolin’s shoulders and smiles like that shouldn’t be an alarming thing to announce.

 

“Oh, and yes, Korra. Your mom did all the design work for this. I thought, if the woman can design an ice palace, she can design an aquarium. And look, I was right!”

 

“Varrick, this is amazing!”

 

Korra wraps her arms around him and picks the much lighter man up. He laughs, ruffling her short hair.

 

Kuvira is pressed against the wall furthest from the glass with a tight mouth and eyes as wide as they’ll go. Mako is feeling a little queasy himself. He decides to join her.

 

“Not a fan of water?” He says.

 

She exhales through her mouth. He’s not sure if the sickly green colour is her skin or the lighting.

 

“No, I like water just fine. Swimming pools, lakes, glasses of water. This… this is a different animal.”

 

“Animals.” Mako says.

 

Something that could only be a baby sea serpent presses against the tank. Mako watches Kuvira’s lip erupt in sweat.

 

“So, you’re uh, dating Korra now?” Mako says.

 

He’s trying to divert her attention from Very Real Danger, but succeeding in being an insensitive dick with terrible timing.

 

“Yeah. We accidentally switched laundry. Now she’s my girlfriend.”

 

Emphasis on ‘my’.

 

“She and I used to date. About four years ago.”

 

Kuvira raises her eyebrows and gives him a tight lipped-no teeth smile that says ‘Yes, I know’.

 

“Is this you trying to do the ‘if you hurt her, then I’ll mess you up’ speech, because I’ve heard and given better ones.”

 

“Well, yeah, but no. What I mean is… Korra’s a great girl. She’s special and she deserves to be with someone who makes her feel that way. Something I couldn’t do. So, what I’m saying is, don’t be me. I was a shitty boyfriend to her and Asami.”

 

That catches Kuvira off guard.

 

“You dated both of them?” She looks down.

 

“What?!”

 

“Is your penis magic or something?”

 

Mako covers his crotch with his hands as if to protect it from any x-ray vision she might have. They’re both briefly distracted by Wu and Bolin pressing against the glass to be eye to eye with a squad of squid. Mako’s fingers tense and relax. The facility is perfectly safe and he can leave them both under the adult supervision of the others.

 

“Why would you even ask that?”

 

Kuvira gives him an incredulous look.

 

“They’re both solid tens and you’re like a six. There must be some kind of pelvic magic working to convince those gorgeous girls to date you.”

 

“Wow, thanks. I come over here to be friendly and you insult me.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

Korra, finally becoming aware that the two people in the room who have played with her boobs(well, naked boobs…. while sober… truth or dare happens and Asami is fun and touchy while drunk) moseys over to diffuse any tension between them. Or stop them from comparing notes.

 

She looks between the two of them. Both with small eyes, long faces, thick eyebrows and thin lips. Both with backgrounds in law enforcement and the adopted children of a Beifong.

 

Bolin is right. She has a type. She’ll deal with this crisis later.

  
  


For now, she cups Kuvira’s cheek. It feels sweaty despite the chill.

 

“Babe, you’re all clammy. Are you feeling okay?”

 

“Just not very comfortable underwater.”

 

“Oh shit. I’m so sorry. Let’s go back upstairs.”

 

She presses reassuring kisses to her forehead, nose, cheeks, and lips. Korra flashes Mako her crooked grin.

 

“Can you let the others know we’re gonna find the Penguotters?”

 

She leads Kuvira off by the hand.

 

“Yeah, sure.” Mako calls after them.

 

The closer they get to the ground level the stronger Kuvira’s grip gets.

 

“Thanks, sorry that you couldn’t look at the rest of your mom’s design.”

 

Korra turns back to her.

 

“Hey, don’t worry about it. It’s not like this place is going anywhere.”

 

They flatten against the wall to let a guided group go through. They exchange the polite smile-head nod with the passing patrons before continuing up the stairs.

 

“It’s funny, while I was down there I realised our parents are in the same professions.” Kuvira says.

 

Korra thinks. Kuvira said her mom’s a dancer and the Matriarch of Zaofu, her dad is an architect. Korra’s dad is the elected chief and the former heavyweight champion, and her mom is an architect.

 

“Heh, wow. I think we may have found the secret formula for badass bitches.”

 

They’re back in the open air and Kuvira feels confident enough to tug Korra close for a nuzzle. They decide to escalate it to a standing cuddle until they feel the eyes of a few middle schoolers on them.

 

“Come on my haughty hottie, let’s go penguin sledding.”

 

Korra leads Kuvira by the hand like a child dragging a parent through the toy store.

 

“They actually let you ride them?” Kuvira says.

 

Excitement has crept into her voice. Korra sighs and lets her shoulders sag.

 

“Not anymore.”

 

 

* * *

 

  
  


“Hey, where’s Korra?” Asami says.

 

Asami notices these things because she’s so conscientious and aware of everything Korra does. She would be such a good girlfriend to Korra if she’d just notice that.

 

Mako, glad to have a chance to say something important puffs out his chest.

 

“Kuvira wasn’t comfortable down here so she and Korra went out for some fresh air. I think they said something about seals.”

 

No one is impressed with Mako, but he’s impressed with himself and that’s what matters.

 

Asami huffs a little. The group had just regrouped and she was going to show off her knowledge of architecture and engineering to Korra. Remind her that she’s one of the greatest and prettiest minds of her generation.

 

“These arch ways were built so that the glass would rest effortlessly on them.” Baatar says.

 

His voice is coloured in awe. He pulls out his phone and starts snapping pictures to send to his father. Baatar keeps trying to engage Asami in friendly conversation about their mutual interests, but she’s been frosty. All because she’s still sulking over Korra.

 

So she confronts someone who can do something about it.

 

“Varrick. I need you to help make Korra jealous.”

 

He looks up from his phone.

 

“Kiddo, that plan is going to backfire. She’s not interested in you romantically or sexually. If you and I started faking lovey-dovey crap then we’d start getting invited out for double dates. You said this is strictly casual friend sex stuff.”

 

Asami stomps her foot like a petulant child. They’re heading away from the underwater room and back up to the lobby in order to regroup their party. Asami and Varrick are heading up the rear, but the hall is still echo-y. The clack has Opal looking over her shoulder. She shoots them a wink. They exchange a look.

 

“Anyway, if it’s a quickie you’re after I wouldn’t be opposed. Pretty sure I have some kind of office in this building with a big enough desk to take you on. Just say the word.”

 

He reaches out and pats Asami’s groin like it just answered a particularly difficult question. Asami is angry at herself for considering it. She inhales deeply through her nose and walks faster, leaving Varrick behind.

 

At the top of the stairs they encounter ‘paparazzi’.

 

“It’s Asami Sato!” A little girl says.

 

There’s a lot of shrieking as an entire class of girls comes clamboring for her autograph. Asami smiles and pretends she didn’t just have an incredibly low moment in the incredibly low part of the aquarium. These girls look up to her damn it! They wanna be her.

 

She takes lots of pictures and writes them autographs saying,

 

‘Follow your dreams, Mimi!’

 

‘Trust your gut and pursue the truth, Indira!’

 

‘Crush the establishment under your high heel, Chingh!’

 

A few of them recognize Bolin and ask him for a picture too. They’re all like twelve and telling him that his bare chest is the sexiest thing they’ve ever seen. Bolin looks incredibly uncomfortable.

 

“Uh, thanks. You’re really young so I’m super flattered, but it’s also super weird. Glad I could help you enter puberty, I guess?” He says.

 

Opal stands with her arms folded against her chest and the most amused expression on her face.

 

In all of the hullabaloo, Mako and Wu have time to sneak off for a quickie in the bathroom. Asami only notices after they come back with Wu looking smug and Mako looking too relaxed for Mako.

 

The class of girls gets herded off by their grateful teacher. Varrick, who was missing for the entire interaction, reappears.

 

“So, I do in fact have an office in this building. Just letting you know.” He says.

 

The others give him a myriad of perplexed looks.

 

“Weren’t we going to find Korra?” Mako says.

 

“She and Kuvira are at the Penguotters Pen. They’ve found the right angle to take pictures so it looks like they’re eating the animals.” Baatar says.

 

He holds up his phone to show three new pictures uploaded to Kuvira’s instagram. One image is a particular amusing shot of a penguotter sliding down a iceberg towards Korra’s open mouth.”

 

Opal giggles.

 

“Fuckin goofs.”

  
  


 

* * *

 

  
  


“Okay, did you know that penguotters give each their mate engagement pebbles? They search entire beaches for just the right pebble and then propose with it.” Korra says.

 

She and Kuvira have acquired hot chocolate to sip while they stare at the animals. They’re shoulder to shoulder leaning against the observation fence.

 

“‘s that so? Do you have a source to cite for that wonderful anthropomorphization of wildlife?” Kuvira says.

 

“Would you shut your pussy trap and let me finish, woman? Fucking skeptics ruining romance.”

 

“Us skeptics ruining false notions with our facts.”

 

Korra’s got her pouty face on. Kuvira can’t help but smirk and bump her with a shoulder.

 

“So, what’s the thing about the engagement pebble?”

 

“Ugh, well, I was going to say that the ancient tribes saw this bizarre ritual and decided to adapt it. They found that pebbles weren’t actually all that practical. So, they started putting the pebbles on strings and offering them to their potential mates as--”

 

“Engagement necklaces.” Kuvira says.

 

“You killjoy, you just stole my punchline after totally ruining my cool story!”

 

Korra elbows her. Kuvira lifts her arm to avoid spilling hot chocolate. She darts in to deliver a fast kiss to Korra. It changes her features from playfully incensed to mushy.

 

With her free hand she grabs Kuvira’s neck and pulls her in close.

 

“I love you so fucking much.” She breathes into Kuvira’s mouth.

 

They’re necking a little inappropriately when they hear a voice.

 

“Do you both suffer some kind of bizarre carbon dioxide deficiency that requires you two to have to suck face all the time?”

 

Kuvira flips her brother off.

 

“Is that a real thing?” Bolin says.

 

“No, Sweetie. It’s really not.” Opal says with a sigh.

 

“Still sounds like a good premise for a Sci-Fi Rom Com. Bolin, make a note.” Varrick says.

 

Korra and Kuvira disengage from their snuggle to just hold hands. They do take breaks when their hands get too sweaty. The leather gloves Kuvira is wearing does optimize the lack of sweat, but it also means lack of full skin contact. Life is hard.

 

“Now what?” Wu says.

 

“There’s rides, midway, food, and exhibits. Right now there’s one on human deformities.” Varrick says.

 

Korra tenses and she watches Kuvira do the same thing. They lock eyes.

 

“I am going to win you the biggest, cutest thing I can find at the midway.” Korra says.

 

“Not if I win it for you first.” Kuvira says.

 

“Bring it on!” Korra says.

 

She gets right in Kuvira’s face so they’re nose to nose.

 

“I’m sure I’ll love whatever you win me regardless of the size!” Kuvira says.

 

“Same goes for me! The fact that you’re winning something for me makes me feel giddy!”

 

Korra breaks character first and starts to giggle. She taps Kuvira on a cheek with a gentle fist. It earns her a slap on the butt.

 

Korra looks up to see Mako giving them that ‘gassy infant’ expression that means he’s thinking. He gives a little approving nod to Korra and she eyes Wu before giving Mako a thumbs up. They’re cool like the other side of the pillow.

  
  


 

* * *

 

  
  


Kuvira overhears Varrick receiving an angry earful from his staff about his guests beating rigged games through sheer testosterone and will power. This pleases her greatly.

 

She sees a giant badgermole plush wobbling towards her. Wrapped around it are a familiar pair of arms. Kuvira hoists up her own giant plush deercat and waves it. Korra’s head pops out from behind the badgermole and she beams. She drops her haul on the carnie’s ledge. He continues to grumble in his defeat.

 

“Is that for me?” Korra says.

 

Kuvira is comparing the deercat and the badgermole to see which is larger.

 

“It was the biggest one I could find.”

 

“I love it. This is for you.”

 

They trade giant stuffed animals and carry them off towards the fire dancing show the others are attending. Their movement through the audience stands is neither stealthy nor graceful. They receive annoyed noises and calls from the people sitting behind them.

 

“Sorry!” Korra hisses.

 

Asami is sitting at the end of their group. She sees their approach and closes her eyes, pausing for strength.

 

“You have a serious problem.” She whispers.

 

“If having an awesome girlfriend who wins me giant stuffed animals at the fair is a problem then I don’t want a solution.” Korra says.

 

Someone loudly hushes them.

 

“What?! It’s not like there’s a lot of dialogue at a fire dance!”

 

\--

 

“I’m cold and my feet hurt. Daddy, can you take me home and put me to bed?” Wu says.

 

He uses baby talk for the last half of the sentence. Mako is bright red and trying to give Wu a wide-eyed glare.

 

“I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.” Baatar says.

 

“Same.” Asami and Kuvira say.

 

“Okay, guys, before we leave. We need to ride the Zhu Li.” Bolin says.

 

Korra snorts and high fives her girlfriend with the plush paw of her deercat.

 

“I am curious to see if it does actually replicate the terror of the existential void.” Opal says.

 

Eight minutes of waiting in the fast track line and a three minutes aboard the Zhu Li later.

 

“Varrick, your park is a death trap.” Asami says.

 

She’s leaning against a fence white knuckled and shaking.

 

“Allegedly.” Varrick says.

 

He’s burst a blood vessel in his right eye. It makes him look evil.

 

Bolin is throwing up in a trash can. Opal rubs slow circles on his back.

 

“There, there Baby, get it all out.” She says.

 

“Woo. Best ride ever. Can’t wait to--” Hurk. “ride it again.” Bolin says.

 

“I think that it did indeed capture the feeling of the existential void.” Baatar says.

 

He’s smoking his E-Cig mechanically. His eyes are comically round behind his glasses.

 

“Daddy, take me home.” Wu says.

 

He doesn’t sound childish or whiny, just tired and lost.

 

For the first time all day, Korra and Kuvira are just quiet.

  
  


 

* * *

 

  
  


Baatar drives on the way home. The other two are piled into the back with their giant stuffed animals. It's a cute and unsafe cuddle puddle of human and toy. Finally, he has leg space and doesn’t have to listen to industrial sounding garbage put to a dance beat. Now he can listen to some real music.

 

“Has this whiny douche with a guitar ever heard of a fucking chord progression? Spirits.” Korra says.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> The penguin fact about pebbles is in fact not true. Which is why I had Kuvira mock it mercilessly. Too bad penguins, your position as 'most romantic animal' still stands due to your fabulous co-parenting and tendency to mate for life.
> 
> Senna designing the aquarium is due to this headcanon I have about her designing/building the elaborate ice palace shown in the beginning of Book 4. Senna is confirmed to be a waterbender, but never shown bending water. I thought maybe she's not a healing bender or a fighting bender, but a building bender. (Bryke pls pay more attention to moms in the future.) 
> 
> This was one of the first parts of the Laundry Verse I thought up. It was also one of the most difficult chapters to write. So many characters to have doing stuff. Unless stated otherwise any character not mentioned is just playing with their phone.
> 
> I had Ke$ha in mind as Korvira's go-to car jam. Baatar is probably listening to some indie band I haven't heard of.
> 
> I was a little conflicted after writing about making Asami such a grump this chapter. Then I remembered how put out she was at the end of Book 1 and went "yeah that's in character". As is almost doing something really stupid with a dude because she feels vulnerable. Luckily Varrick doesn't just go for it like Mako.
> 
> I wrote this stupid-late. Any mistakes are due to lack of sleep and beta.
> 
> Please let me know what you think. Comments fuel my creativity.


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